Mimetic Desire: A Hidden Law of Human Nature
Mimetic Desire is a discovery deep-rooted in human nature which was discovered by the late great philosopher and polymath René Girard. Girard wrote around 30 books in his lifetime among which one of his biggest contributions has been the discovery of mimetic desire in human nature.
Mimetic means to imitate. Mimetic Desire thus means desire through imitation.
Girard has mentioned in his Magnum opus, Things Hidden Since The Foundation of the World, in-depth about Mimetic Desire.
I first came to known about Girard and Mimetic Desire through Peter Thiel who mentions his admiration of Girard in several of his videos and how it has shaped both his life choices and investing decisions.
Mimetic desire is a concept which once you grasp, you cannot unsee it ever again. And, that will change the way you view everything.
Rethink how you desire what you desire
“The human subject does not really know what to desire, in the last resort. He is quite incapable on his own of fixing his desire on one object and, on his own, of desiring that object consistently and relentlessly.”- Rene Girard
Aristotle mentioned how “Man differs from the other animals in his greater aptitude for imitation.”
The truth is that people do not know what they want and thus imitate that which is done by other people.
This has been a concept that has been around since the origin of human beings. It’s our default setting.
The way that the human brain is formed is that it is an enormous imitating machine. As a result, we do not desire things directly but through seeing other people desiring them, we too come to desire it.
Girard explains this by giving the example of placing numerous toys in a room full of children. There are more toys than there are children in the room. However, a kid starts by picking up a toy. Now, another kid wants the same toy as well though there are other options in the room. Because of this, now the other kids are interested in this toy as well.
This experiment showed the insight that there is a certain probability that the toys will not be distributed among the children without quarrel over the same toys.
This is mimetic desire in action.
Here we are talking about abstract things. There are needs such as food, water, shelter, and sex that are intrinsic in nature and we desire them intrinsically.
However, abstract things such as choices in career, choices in fashion, stocks, cars, the series you choose to watch, and many more come under the influence of mimetic desire. In simple words, Mimetic Desire shapes our wants which if we do not control are limitless.
Triangular Desire Explanation
Luke Burgis is an author who has written a much-needed book for the 21st century regarding Rene Girard’s mimetic desire in his book “Wanting”. In one of his articles, he mentions the triangular desire that humans go through superbly.
1) Model desires object
2) Subject imitates a model
3) Subject imitates the desire and believes their “imitated desire” (at the bottom) is entirely their own.
Here, we do not choose objects of our desires independently.
Rather, there is always a model of desire which is involved. This could mean a third person or a group who is modeled for the desire.
Triangular Desire: Imitated from Rene Girard
Those models could be your friends and family. This is why word of mouth is such an effective form of marketing. When other people who we trust recommend something to us, we desire the object a lot more.
Another model could be the people we admire. These could be people we never meet in our own lives but admire such as celebrities. When Beyonce wears that new bag, instantly an army of women who admire her are now in search of such a bag.
Mimetic Desire is responsible for the constant chase that never ends
All desire is based upon getting something that we believe we lack in our lives.
“The subject knows by experience that disillusionment awaits him on the other side of any obstacle that can too easily be overcome. So he sets out to find the insurmountable obstacle, the unbeatable rival, and the ungraspable object. Through a process of reasoning that is false but logically impeccable, it puts its stake on the least likely probability. It decides that the only objects worthy of being desired are those that do not allow themselves to be possessed”- Rene Girard
And, that is the gist of why people live their entire life in “chase” mode, not “live” mode.
In today’s age, social media has been a big factor that influences mimetic desire in us.
This can lead to big psychological problems for people. People have so many models including a bunch of friends and influencers they look up to that they see on a daily basis, their desires can go off in a million different directions while never feeling satisfied.
That can lead to a vicious cycle where your chasing things other people want constantly but never becoming internally fulfilled.
Students before and after college is an example of important decisions in life that mimetic desire affects immensely. If you ask students before college what they want to be, we will hear a variety of answers. However, after college is over, that variation in careers becomes clustered towards only some career choices that most people are inclined towards.
This is also the same reason why being aware of how your desires are influenced through mimesis becomes so important.
Peter Thiel, the billionaire investor, actually studied law in college and went on to work in a law firm. He has mentioned how these choices were completely influenced because of mimetic desire.
Only once he got into the law firm did he realize that this was not for him at all. This is not what he wanted to do in life.
This makes it inevitable that many people will have an identity crisis about their careers having a shallow feeling of missing something. You can thank(or curse)Mimesis.
Now, you might say to yourself, I am an individual who is in control of my own choices and am fulfilling my own desires.
But, like it or not, all of us are influenced by mimetic desire.
The key is being anti-mimetic in things that do not matter to us. However, mimesis can be good as well. There are many people who have found their direction in life by finding role models that they look up to and following in their footsteps.
Mimetic Desire is the first part that you need to know but, that is not the end of the picture. Rene Girard mentions how Mimetic Desire tends to lead to Mimetic Rivalry.
Mimetic Rivalry
Mimetic Rivalry occurs when people take each other as models of desire and go on to compete for the same things such as career, success, women, or power.
This rivalry occurs because of the sameness among people. This leads to a back and forth where people are continuously trying to differentiate themselves only to be imitated towards the sameness.
“Human beings fight not because they are different, but because they are the same, and in their attempts to distinguish themselves have made themselves into enemy twins, human doubles in reciprocal violence.”
However, such a rivalry can become personal and can go too far leading to people forgetting why they were originally fighting for and just being in rivalry.
Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger are a good example of Mimetic Rivalry. In the video, Stallone mentions how he would do Rambo and Arnold would do Commando.
This trend went on and on for several films and Stallone admits that at one point they hated each other. In search of creating a differentiation, they went on to become more and more same.
(You can skip forward to 2:10 for the part Stallone mentions this)
“What is impressive in imitative phenomena is that those who participate in them never cease imitating one another, each one transforming himself into a simulacrum of the other. Competitors are fundamentally those who run or walk together, rivals those who dwell on opposite banks of the same river.”- Rene Girard
This feeling of wanting to destroy the enemy can reduce the quality of your own life because your center focus becomes on destroying your enemy and continuously trying to catch up with them rather than meeting your own desires first.
In short, mimetic rivalry can end up destroying yourself in the process.
Rivalries exist everywhere. Among businesses, friends, in the workplace among co-workers, and even within the family. And of course, how can we forget political parties?
Mimetic desire which leads to mimetic rivalry always succeeds in creating more and more undifferentiation.
Mimesis in the world today
The problem is that we tend to see competition as validation. Now, the problem with this is that it can get pretty irrational.
The reality is that more competition means less gain. Competition has been a concept that has been normalized in society as necessary and good. As a result, our thinking is based on the premise that something becomes more and more valuable if more people are competing for it.
For instance, the more people that apply to the same university, the more you feel that you too should apply to this university. While in actuality, the high number of applicants makes your probability of being selected narrower.
Another instance is the capital markets. All of a sudden everyone wants to invest in bitcoin. Most people don’t even know how the technology behind Bitcoin works but since other people desire it, you desire it too. And, thus its value goes up and up in the eyes of people.
When we see a stock rally with its price going up and up way beyond its fundamental value, this is the mimetic wave that is taking place in the stock market.
However, the other side is equally or even more mimetic. Once a bearish mood swings among people, the mimetic wave catches on very fast and we see bubbles bursting a lot faster than the time it took them to get up.
You can convince your mind as much as you want about seeing objective qualities and independent evaluation being reasons for desiring something but that is all but the story we like to tell ourselves.
In short, it’s B.S. Mimetic Desire is Real.
The contrary is equally true as well. We only want things that other people want and so if other people don’t want them, you too do not feel desire for them.
A fundamental nature of humans is that we want what we can’t have.
Our minds are convinced that the models we look up to are closer to the things we desire i.e. mimic, than we are. And, we love the constant chase of these desires.
What being aware of Mimetic Desire can do for you
Mimetic desire makes it clear that the way we desire what we desire is social in nature.
By being aware of mimetic desire, you can choose to think for yourself about where you should be anti-mimetic and where it is okay to be mimetic.
“Our goal is not to be anti-mimetic. Our goal is to be mimetic in all of the right ways, and anti-mimetic where necessary.”
This is because at the end of the day, humans have the ability to choose our own thoughts based on our conscience and so we can choose what we want to desire rather than letting countless externals dictate our life.
If you look back at your life and realize you’ve been living on autopilot wanting what other people want, you might have to say WTF on your death bed.
You don’t want that.
Steps you can take
If there is one thing that you can take away after knowing about mimetic desire, it is about decluttering your desires and being razor-focused on only those desires that are in alignment with what you want.
Yes, they too are probably mimetic in some form. Yet, they have weight to them in the sense that they give you fulfillment your heart wants rather than a temporary high after which you’re in search of many more desires.
In fact, there is no way of distinguishing on an objective basis, no way of making a systematic overall distinction, between forms of behavior that are ‘good’ to imitate and those that are not. It is here that your values, what you stand for come into play.
Once we understand our desires and especially how we tend to get them, it brings us a deeper understanding of ourselves.
Another key takeaway you can have with mimetic desire is to change your assumption that more competition is better. In many cases, not competing makes a lot more sense. It might be time for you to rethink if seeing other people as a threat and rivals are worth any time.
This is the law of nature and being aware of it is the first step to your true freedom.
Even God has warned us strongly against mimetic desire as is mentioned in the 10th commandment:
“You shall not covet the house of your neighbor. You shall not covet the wife of your neighbor, nor his male or female slave, nor his ox or his ass, nor anything that belong to him.” (Exod. 20:17)
